


Consent

by AutisticWriter



Series: Writer's Month 2019 [10]
Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Alternate Universe - Age Changes, Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Fingering, Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Autism, Autism Spectrum, Autistic Terra (Kingdom Hearts), Crying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dark, Explicit Sexual Content, First Kiss, First Meetings, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Hand Jobs, Kissing, M/M, Nightmares, One Shot, Panic Attacks, Past Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Terra/Xehanort (Kingdom Hearts), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Prompt Fic, Prostate Massage, Self-Esteem Issues, Sequel, Smut, Trauma, Vanitas & Ventus Are Siblings (Kingdom Hearts), Victim Blaming, Writer's Month 2019, terraven - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-13
Updated: 2019-08-13
Packaged: 2020-08-23 21:53:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20235526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AutisticWriter/pseuds/AutisticWriter
Summary: Three years ago, Terra became famous on campus for testifying against his abusive professor, Xehanort. Now, Xehanort is behind bars, but Terra deals with PTSD and low self esteem. When Ven meets Terra, he is drawn to his handsome senior, but soon realises how much Terra has to deal with. And whilst Ven tries his best to be a good friend and later boyfriend, he learns that Terra’s triggers can make the simplest things difficult. But they stay together and Ven does his best to help Terra recover from the horrors he went through.Prompt 10: Dark AU





	Consent

When Ven first met Terra, he recognised him from somewhere. He stared at the third year student, torn between admiring his body and worrying about the anxious expression on his face, and it hit him. Three years ago, he saw Terra on the news.

And then it hit him again, and he wanted to cry. He stared at Terra, trying not to look weird as his mind whirred. Terra was all over the local news three years ago, and not for a good reason.

Three years ago, a professor at this university, Professor Xehanort, was arrested on charges of raping and abusing one of his students. And Terra bravely came out and stood in court as a witness, letting the world know he was the one Xehanort abused. What Ven remembers most about the case was the way the media treated Terra; when he and Vanitas, his brother, watched the news, they always saw people talking about Terra, smearing his name and victim blaming him so much. Poor Terra was so brave, but everyone treated him like shit for daring to speak out. And whilst Terra’s testimony got Xehanort twenty years in prison, people still badmouth him to this day. In fact, all of that probably explains why Terra failed first year and was held back, making him a twenty two year old third year.

And Ven sees it first hand as he wanders around the campus of his new college. Everyone gives Terra funny looks, and a lot of people say horrible things behind his back. He hears things like ‘liar’ and ‘deserved it’ and ‘stupid’ and he wants to smack them all. Poor Terra.

Ven wants to go and talk to Terra, but he has no idea what to say. So he just hurries off to find his dorm, confused and hating everyone who says such horrible things about a victim of abuse.

\---

The night after Ven’s nineteenth birthday, he has a hangover. He didn’t even have much to drink, but his head pounds and pounds. Still, he can’t complain, or he’ll get yelled at for underage drinking on campus.

After struggling through his first lecture, Ven takes a trip to the nurse, hoping to get some painkillers. He knocks on the door and enters, but stops when he realises there is someone there.

Terra sits hunched up on the bed, holding a cardboard bowl in shaking hands. He’s so pale, covered in a film of sweat, and Ven wouldn’t be surprised if he fainted at any moment. The nurse stands in front of him, talking in a soft voice. After straining his ears, he realises she is helping Terra time his breathing.

“Oh, sorry!” Ven says, remembering what he’s doing.

Terra jumps and they both turn to look at him. The nurse gives Terra a glance and they exchange a look, before she walks over to Ven.

“No, it’s fine, dear,” she says. “Terra doesn’t mind other people in here with him. Is there anything you need?”

“Um… just some painkillers.”

The nurse shakes her head, sighing. Does she know about his hangover? Nurses are scary.

Still, she passes him two pills and a cup of water, and tells Ven to sit on the bed. He sits at the other end to Terra as he takes the painkillers, swallowing them with the freezing cold water.

The nurse’s cell phone buzzes and she sighs, pulling it out of her pocket. “I need to go. Will you be okay, Terra?”

He nods. “Y-Yeah.”

And she leaves them alone, shutting the door behind her. Ven glances at Terra, not sure what to do. He doesn’t even know what is wrong with Terra, let alone how to possibly help. He knows he wanted to support Terra, but this is…

“I, uh… I’m just about over a p-panic attack,” Terra says, his voice shaky.

“A panic attack?” Ven says.

Terra nods, swallowing. “Yeah. they… happen a lot. I come here… it’s normal for me.”

Terra has panic attacks? Is this related to the Xehanort thing? It must be.

But he doesn’t ask. He can’t bring up old wounds. Terra was his age when that happened to him, and must have changed a lot these past three years.

Terra heaves in a deep breath, leaning backwards and resting his head against the wall. “Sorry you had to see this.”

“It’s okay,” Ven says. “Think about it; if I didn’t wanna stay with you, would I still be here?”

After all, the nurse didn’t order him to stay for a set period of time. He could have left the moment he finished his water. But he stayed. Partly out of curiosity, but mostly… concern.

Terra looks at him, finally puffing out the breath he was holding, exhaling slowly like blowing out candles on a cake. “Do you… mean that?”

“Uh huh. I know we don’t know each other, but… I didn’t wanna leave you alone.”

“Th-Thanks,” Terra says.

After several long, long minutes, Terra comes out of the panic attack. He’s left trembling and weak, but he looks mostly normal again. Now he has stopped panicking, Terra starts rubbing his thumb over the knuckles on his forefinger, a repetitive motion.

“Seriously, thanks,” Terra says.

“It’s nothing. Um… Terra…” Ven finds himself going red, and he sighs. “Do you want to be friends?”

He knows he sounds like a kid, but how else does he say it?

Terra blinks slowly, taking in those words. “I, I’d like that,” he says, voice trembling slightly.

Ven smiles, hoping he isn’t Terra’s only friend.

\---

“Ven, do you know about… me?” Terra asks, staring down at his tightly clasped hands.

They sit together in a corner of the library, supposedly studying but really just procrastinating.

Ven looks up, shocked at the sudden question. It’s vague, but he knows exactly what Terra’s words imply. “I… do. It was on the news a lot.”

Terra swallows. “Do you believe what everyone said? That I… asked for it? Or it wasn’t really… r-rape?”

“Of course I don’t,” Ven says, shaking his head hard enough to make his neck click. “They’re all horrible people. Terra, Xehanort is an evil, abusive man, and he hurt you. It wasn’t your fault, and everyone who talks about you that way is hateful.”

Terra continues to stare at his hands, but they start to tremble. Ven doesn’t see the tears until one drips onto Terra’s hand, and he spots the tears running down Terra’s face.

“Terra, don’t cry…”

“Sorry,” Terra says, sniffing. “It’s just… that means so much to me. Thank you, Ven.”

\---

Ven stands in the doorway, studying the room. It’s always strange to enter someone’s bedroom; it’s like you’re peering directly into their mind. All aspects of their personality shine through in their belongings and habits, and it’s kind of fascinating.

Well, in this instance, it’s more just embarrassment. Ever since he and Terra became friends, Ven has sort of had a crush on him, so to see Terra’s bedroom makes him go a bit red.

Terra’s dorm room is understated, his belongings tidy but not meticulous, and Ven can’t really spot many signs of his interests. But it’s still Terra’s room, so it’s important to Ven. He and Terra haven’t been friends for very long, but he treasures their bond; of course he finds it fascinating to be here.

“Sorry it’s not much…” Terra says.

“No, it’s fine. You should see my dorm – it’s such a mess!” Ven says, laughing.

Terra smiles. “Really?”

“Uh huh. I’ve never been very good at tidying up after myself. Wow, dorms sure are big when you don’t have crap everywhere, huh?”

That makes Terra laugh, a real chuckle escaping his mouth. It’s rare to see Terra smile, let alone laugh. Ven beams.

“A-Anyway,” Terra says, clearing his throat. “What should we do?”

“Oh yeah,” Ven says, chuckling awkwardly.

Of course; Terra invited him back to his dorm, but they never actually discussed what they were going to do. Thoughts of things he could do with Terra flash through his mind, and Ven begs himself not to get an erection; just because he fancies Terra doesn’t mean Terra feels the same way. Would Terra even be comfortable having sex?

“Ven, you’ve gone red. Are you okay?”

Ven looks at Terra, noticing the heat that radiates from his cheeks. “Oh, no, I’m fine. Uh… would you be able to help me study?”

“Study?”

“Yeah. I’m really struggling with my math, and I was wondering if you’d… help?”

“Um, I guess I could do that,” Terra says. “I mean, I did take first year twice and the classes are pretty much the same, so…” He trails off, rubbing his hands together. “Wouldn’t you rather ask someone else?”

Ven stares at him. “Why would I do that?”

“’Cause there are plenty of much smarter people here and… I’m not sure I’m a very good teacher.”

“I’m sure you’ll be an awesome teacher.”

Terra’s eyes widen, face going red. “R-Really?”

Ven smiles, nodding. “Yeah. when we study together, you’re so… in depth when you take notes. I bet you’d be great.”

“Well, if you think that…” Terra rubs the back of his neck, and gives Ven an awkward smile. “I’d be honoured.”

“Awesome!” Ven says, grinning.

\---

Ven stares at Terra, not sure how to do this. he hasn’t dated anyone since he started university, so he fears he might be a bit rusty at all this stuff. Besides, Terra gets anxious easily, so he doesn’t want to end up accidentally scaring Terra by doing anything that might remind him of Xehanort. Terra said he has PTSD, and Ven has done a lot of research into how to be a caring partner for someone with PTSD, but he’s still worried. He doesn’t want to hurt Terra by accident. But he wants to do this so badly.

He wants Terra to be his boyfriend.

He knows he got an immature crush soon after they made friends, but this is different. This is beyond finding Terra attractive or fantasising about having sex with him; he cares deeply about Terra, and he wants to be in a loving, caring relationship with him.

Once again, they sit in Terra’s bedroom, studying. Despite his fears, Terra is a very good teacher, and Ven finds himself finally understanding things that went over his head in lectures. He might panic easily and sometimes find it hard to get the right words out, but Terra always makes sure Ven understands everything they talk about. They sit at the low table in the middle of the room, legs tucked under them as they both sit on orange cushions.

But, today, Ven can’t concentrate. How should he do it?

“Ven, are you okay?” Terra has put down his pen and studies Ven, concerned. “You’re daydreaming a lot. Is something on your mind?”

“I’m okay. But, yeah, something is bugging me.”

Terra tenses up, the reaction quicker than Ven ever expected. “Have I done anything?”

“No, no you’ve done nothing wrong,” he says. “I just… I… Terra, can I ask you something?”

“Oh… sure.”

Ven leans closer to Terra, but not close enough to invade his personal space. “Uh…” His face goes red, cheeks burning. “Would you like… to go out with me?”

Saying it like that makes him sound like a child, but he can’t take it back now.

Terra blinks, staring at Ven. And then the words sink in and he flinches, swallowing hard. “Ven, do you mean that?”

He nods. “I’d love it if we could date. No pressure, obviously.”

“No, I mean, I…” Terra exhales shakily, managing a nervous smile. “I’d love to date you, Ven. But… are you sure you’d wanna put up with someone like me?”

_Put up with someone like me…_

Shit, just how low is Terra’s self esteem?

“I mean… I’m autistic and have all these problems and I just don’t get why…”

Terra trails off when Ven slowly extends a hand, holding it out towards him. He stares down at Ven’s hand and tentatively touches Ven’s hand. He grasps with sweaty fingers, and Ven squeezes tightly.

“Terra, please don’t talk about yourself like that,” Ven says, a lump forming in his throat but willing himself to cry. “I don’t want to ‘put up with’ you. I like you for who you are. I know you’ve got PTSD, but that doesn’t make you a bad person. I… I want to be with you.”

“Ven…” Terra shifts his hand in Ven’s grip, interlocking their fingers. He trembles, but manages to smile. “Ven… I want to be with you too. C-Can we hug?”

“Sure we can,” Ven says, holding his arms out.

He doesn’t want to accidentally trigger Terra, leaving the first move to his friend – no, they’re dating now, so Terra is his boyfriend. Terra sits there, staring at Ven. He untangles his hand from Ven’s, rubbing his thumb over his knuckles on the same hand. Ven did some research into autism too; it looks like this is a stim, something Terra does to soothe himself or stimulate his senses. He stops staring at Terra’s hands, not wanting to make Terra think he finds him annoying or anything.

Slowly, like he’s moving underwater, Terra shuffles around the table until they kneel side by side. He moves closer, arms looping under Ven’s armpits, and pulls Ven into an embrace, pressing his face into Ven’s shoulder. Terra wraps his arms tight around Ven, hands grabbing at the loose fabric of his sweatshirt. For a second, Ven just savours the warmth of Terra’s body (and tries to ignore Terra’s very, very rapid heartbeat), but quickly returns the hug, snaking his arms around Terra and holding him close.

It seems like forever as they sit there, arms wrapped around each other, but, eventually, Terra clears his throat and moves away.

His face is flushed, but he smiles. It’s so rare to see Terra smile. Especially an adorable, handsome smile like this.

“Ven, thank you.”

“No, thank you,” Ven says, grinning. “So… we’re boyfriends now, right?”

Terra’s ears flush as red as his cheeks, but his smile doesn’t falter. “Yeah, I guess we are.”

He holds out his hand and Ven clasps it again, interlocking their fingers.

This is amazing.

\---

“Ven, could I kiss you?”

Ven looks up from his notes, glancing at Terra. His boyfriend sits beside him on the bed, pressing the end of his pen against his chin. When he sees Ven looking at him, Terra starts to nibble on the pen, leaving teeth marks in the plastic.

“Sorry, was that a bit too sudden?”

“No, not at all.” Part of Ven wants to yell in excitement and jump on Terra and kiss him, but that part is stupid. The rational part of Ven beams like a dork and says, “I’d love that.”

“That’s great,” Terra says, smiling. “It’s just, I, uh, don’t have much experience. If you ignore the whole thing with him, I haven’t kissed someone since a guy in high school.”

“Yeah, let’s definitely not count him,” Ven says. “Nothing he did counts as experience, Terra.”

“I guess that makes me still a virgin…” Terra goes bright red, letting out an awkward chuckle. “Sorry, that was weird.” But as he laughs, Ven spots his eyes shining.

“Terra?”

“Sorry. It’s just… nobody’s ever made me think of it that way. Thank you, Ven.”

Terra grasps Ven’s hand, squeezing tightly. Ven just sits there, taking it all in. so, was Ven seriously the first person to tell Terra that rape doesn’t count as sexual experience? It seems so obvious to Ven (after all, sex has to be consensual to be sex so if there’s no consent it’s not sex so you haven’t lost your virginity… right?), but no one has ever said that to Terra. So many people have failed him.

“It’s nothing. Anyway, there’s nothing wrong with being inexperienced. To tell the truth… I’ve never kissed a guy before,” Ven says, face flushing.

“Really?”

He nods. “Yeah. I’m bi, but I’ve never dated a guy before. So this will be really new for me, too.”

Terra smiles, relaxing slightly. “Oh, that’s good.”

“So… do you wanna do this?” Ven asks.

Terra nods slowly, and Ven shuffles closer. He puts his hands on Terra’s shoulders, pulling Terra down to his height so they can actually do this, and tilts his head up, staring at Terra’s face. And, slowly, Ven moves closer, and presses his lips against Terra’s.

He feels the gasp as well as hears it, but he isn’t sure who makes the sound. Terra’s lips move against his, kissing him back. Ven tilts his head, angling so they don’t bump noses, and kisses Terra harder. Arousal throbs in his dick, but Ven ignores it, just focusing on the kiss.

After several seconds, they pull apart. Terra inhales sharply, smiling at Ven.

“Was that okay?” Ven asks.

“It was awesome.”

And they kiss again. Terra rests his hands on Ven’s back, pulling him closer as they kiss. Ven deepens the kiss, nudging Terra’s lips with his tongue, and Terra reacts, parting his lips. But when Ven wraps his lips around Terra’s bottom lip and starts to gently suck and tease the skin with his tongue, Terra goes still. Too still. He sits there, and Ven hears the hitch of his breath.

Instantly, Ven pulls away. “Terra, are you okay?”

Terra touches his lips, eyes too wide and panic written across his face. He swallows hard, trembling.

“Terra?”

“I’m sorry. It’s just… when you did that with your tongue, it reminded me of him and I can’t get a memory out of my head and…” Terra grabs his head, hunching forward. He heaves in a jagged breath, whole body shaking.

Terra’s eyes aren’t right. He’s looking at Ven and processing the scene, but he doesn’t seem totally there. Could this be a flashback? Ven read how they’re different to the portrayals in the movies and the person is usually still responsive somewhat, so it might be the case.

Did he just accidentally trigger Terra, setting off a button neither of them knew was there?

No, now’s not the time to wonder what is happening! He needs to help Terra.

“Terra, it’s okay. It’s okay. You’re with me. I didn’t know that would hurt you and I’m so sorry. But you’re okay. You’re safe.”

Ven keeps babbling, unsure if it will help but unable to shut himself up.

Terra stares at Ven, trembling. “I… I didn’t know e-either. Ven… I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be stupid. It was my fault. Is there anything I can do to help? You need a drink? Want a hug? There has to be something I can do,” Ven says, and his voice cracks on his last word.

“Just… can we hug again?” Terra says, trying to catch his breath.

“Of course we can. I’m so sorry, Terra.”

“It’s okay, really.” Terra wraps his arms around Ven, pressing his face into Ven’s neck. All Ven can hear is Terra’s shuddery breathing; all he can feel is Terra’s heart drumming against his chest. “Just… please don’t go.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Ven says, holding Terra close.

\---

“Ven, I… I want…” Terra stammers over his words before giving up completely. He sighs shakily, bouncing his leg.

They sit side by side on Ven’s bed, watching a movie on Ven’s small TV. But Ven can’t concentrate, more focused on Terra’s body heat. He wants to kiss Terra, but can’t stop worrying about the disaster that was last time, so he just sits there, awkward and a bit horny and not sure what to do. Dating a guy with trauma is difficult.

He looks at Terra, studying his red face and tense posture. “Are you okay?”

“I was thinking… I liked kissing you, but not when it became open mouthed kissing, if that makes any sense.”

“I get you.”

Terra smiles weakly, starting to go red. “That’s good. Thing is… I think I’d be fine at kissing other places too, like your face and neck and collarbone. If… uh…”

“It’s okay. To be honest, I’d like that.” Just the thought of Terra’s lips against his neck makes Ven shiver with arousal, and he smiles. “Why’re you bringing this up all of a sudden?”

“It’s just… I was thinking… maybe we could…” He takes a deep breath. “Ven… I… can we… fuck?” Terra can barely get the word out, humiliated.

Ven gives him a soft kiss, stroking his hair. “Terra, you don’t need to be embarrassed. We’re already making out. Of course we can fuck. But… what are you comfortable with?”

“I… I can’t penetrate you… I just can’t.” Terra sits up, crossing his legs. His erection strains his pants, but his sudden anxiety seems to take over. Just what happened with Xehanort? “It would… but… could you… fuck me?”

“You want me to fuck me?” Ven says, his dick throbbing. “I’ll do whatever makes you feel safest. I’ve got lube and condoms, so we can do whatever you want.”

“I’d love that,” Terra says, kissing him. “But… I need to tell you something first. It’s about… it.”

“That’s okay. Whatever you need.”

Terra gulps. “The day he was arrested, he made me fuck myself with a really big anal dildo. I had no lube and it really, really hurt to put in when I’d never even f-fingered myself before, and I bled. And…” Terra trembles, and Ven takes his hand. “It was a vibrator so he turned it on at full speed and I screamed in pain and arousal and it alerted other professors and Xehanort was trying to pull it out when Professor Aced kicked the door down and he and professor Ava saw me naked and I was so scared I fainted and…” He takes a slow, shaky breath. “My first experience bottoming was… unpleasant.”

Ven’s eyes burn, and he wills himself not to cry. As horrible as it was to hear, he can’t make this about his emotions. “Terra…”

“So, I… please, I need you inside me, but… please go slow. And… can we do missionary? I want to see your face when… Sorry, this is so awkward.”

It is awkward, but negotiating sex stuff has never not been awkward.

“It’s not a problem. So… when do you wanna do it?”

“Are you hard enough yet?”

Ven wants to comment on how his boner is making a damp patch on his underpants, but instead simply nods. “Uh huh. I’m ready when you are.”

“Okay… let’s do this.”

Slowly and carefully, they undress each other. As they slip off each other’s shirts, Terra makes sure to trail kisses across Ven’s collar bone, whilst Ven carefully teases Terra’s nipples. When they’re totally naked, Ven can’t stop staring at Terra’s cock, and Terra chuckles awkwardly. Ven gives him a kiss and Terra presses himself against Ven, his erection prodding Ven in the stomach.

“Let me prepare you,” Terra says.

Ven smiles, fumbling for the lube and condoms. They sit on the bed as Terra unwraps a condom, fingers fumbling slightly, and Ven kisses Terra all over his neck. Terra looks at Ven, avoiding eye contact, but they don’t need it. When Ven gives a nod, Terra places the condom on the head of Ven’s aching dick, and starts rolling it down his shaft. Ven gasps and grabs Terra, smashing a kiss into Terra’s neck.

“Okay, now let me help you out,” Ven says.

Terra lies on his back, knees bent and legs spread. Ven covers his fingers with cold lube, and crawls between Terra’s legs. Carefully, he traces his fingers around Terra’s entrance, making Terra shudder.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m good. It feels good.”

Adding more lube, Ven pushes his finger in deeper, carefully coating Terra’s hole. As Terra’s muscles loosen, he adds another finger, pushing them in further and hooking to rub the ring of muscles around his entrance. Terra gasps, and Ven pauses for a second to check Terra is okay.

He knows you don’t actually need much prep to have anal, that some lube and the person going in slowly makes it perfectly good, but he wants to be extra careful with Terra. So despite his throbbing arousal, Ven takes several minutes just fingering Terra’s ass, making him loose and relaxed and slippery, wanting Terra to be comfortable. Thoughts of Terra injuring himself with a dildo as Xehanort watched flash through his mind, and Ven forces them away. This will be nothing like that.

Terra melts beneath him, incredibly relaxed. He angles his back, raising his hips slightly, making it easier for Ven to slide his fingers in and out, and reaches out to grab Ven by the wrist. Ven thrusts his fingers in and out slowly, managing to get four in after all this time, before switching back to two and finding Terra’s prostate. He rubs slowly, and soon Terra awakens to the stimulation.

“Fuck, Ven,” he gasps, arching his back further. “Fuck…”

He thrusts and stretches and strokes, fucking Terra carefully with his fingers, and finds himself moaning at the beautiful sounds Terra makes when he rubs his prostate. So Ven keeps his focus on Terra’s prostate, massaging the sensitive area, and Terra moans.

Awkwardly, Terra props himself up and braces a hand behind his back to keep himself upright. He leans forwards and puts his other hand on the back of Ven’s neck, eyes focused on his forehead. Terra gives him a kiss, gently pressing their lips together – and then tenses up and clenches around Ven’s fingers. And Terra groans into Ven’s mouth as he comes all over his stomach.

Terra flinches, pulling away. He stares at Ven with wide eyes, and Ven realises something is wrong. Terra wriggles backwards, letting Ven’s fingers slide out of him, and he gulps, trembling.

“Terra?”

“I’m sorry I came before you could… I’m sorry I came too soon. Please don’t be mad.”

Terra tenses like expecting a slap, and Ven’s heart shatters. Oh shit… did Xehanort get angry if Terra came before he had permission?

“No, no, Terra, it’s okay,” Ven says. “It’s okay.”

Terra scrabbles backwards, almost falling as he gets off of the bed and climbs to his feet, panic in his eyes. “I’m sorry. It’s just… that felt so good and I haven’t fucked for a long while and… huh?” He finally processes Ven’s words, freezing in place.

“I said it’s okay. I’m not mad. In fact…” He goes red. “I’m flattered I made you come with just my fingers.”

Terra stares at him, and lets out an awkward chuckle as he creeps back over to the bed. He sits down, kneeling beside Ven. “So… you’re not mad?”

He gives Terra a kiss. “Of course I’m not mad.”

“That’s good,” Terra says, pressing a slightly awkward kiss against Ven’s jaw. “Um… how do you want to sort yourself out? I’m fine with hand jobs, and I think I’m okay with oral. What do you want, Ven?”

Ven tries to get his thoughts away from Terra’s sudden panic at coming without permission or that wonderful sound Terra made as he climaxed, instead focusing on his own problem. His dick throbs beneath the condom, the need to climax getting kind of painful. There are so many things he wants to do, but he doesn’t want to risk accidentally triggering Terra; he said he thinks he could do oral, but is ‘think’ safe enough? He doesn’t want to hurt Terra?

So Ven smiles and says, “A hand job sounds perfect. I, uh, I’ll take this off.”

As Terra shuffles closer, Ven peels off the condom, shoving it into the torn packet to get rid of later. Just taking off the condom makes him shudder, a small moan escaping his throat. He’s so horny, but he doesn’t want this to be over.

“Are you ready?” Terra asks.

Ven nods, and Terra swallows. And then Terra reaches out and carefully strokes his fingers across Ven’s balls. Ven gasps, the sound turning into a moan when Terra’s fingers trail upwards, wrapping around the base of his shaft. Terra squeezes gently, letting his hand slide up Ven’s length, and Ven groans, letting his head flop forwards. Terra’s extends his thumb and rests it on the head of Ven’s cock, smearing it with pre-come. And when he starts to rub circles with his thumb, Ven cries out, slumping forwards until his forehead rests against Terra’s shoulder.

“Are you okay?” Terra asks.

“That feels so good,” Ven mumbles. “Please do that again.”

So Terra does. He keeps rubbing circles on the head of Ven’s cock, his pre-come acting as lube. Ven shudders, tensing up, and just focuses on the feeling of Terra’s hand against his dick. He’s never had such a good hand job, not even when masturbating.

Just as Ven feared, he doesn’t last long. Just the feeling of Terra stroking him becomes too much, and he climaxes, coming all over Terra’s hand. And then Ven just gasps for breath, trembling.

Slowly, he pulls backwards. Ven raises his head and stares at Terra, studying his flushed cheeks and beautiful smile.

“Terra, that was amazing. You’re so good at this.”

“Th-Thank you.” Terra kisses his neck, lips gently pressing against his clammy skin. “Ven, thank you. Tonight was… amazing. I… just, thank you.”

Ven pulls Terra into a hug, holding him close. “Thank you,” he whispers, just savouring the truly wonderful experience they shared.

\---

Ven stays the night, cuddling up beside Terra in the bed. The single bed is far too cramped for two people, so they have to snuggle close, limbs intertwined. Ven finds himself most comfortable with their legs tangled together and his arm slug across Terra’s chest, facing Terra with his forehead resting against Terra’s chin. He can’t honestly call it comfortable, but it’s soothing and just feels right after having sex.

Ven falls asleep first, listening to Terra’s breathing. But he awakes in the middle of the night to find Terra too still, eyes wide as he stares up at the ceiling. Tears leak from the corners of his eyes and dribble onto his temples.

“Terra?” he whispers. “You okay?”

“I had… a nightmare.”

_About Xehanort. _He doesn’t add those words, but they both think it.

“Do you have them a lot?”

“Yeah.”

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

Terra moves his arm to hug Ven again, pulling him closer. “Please just… hug me. Remind me I’m with you. Just… be here.”

Ven smiles weakly, rubbing Terra’s back. “I can do that.”

And he stays beside Terra, rubbing his back and keeping him company, until Terra calms down.

“Thank you, Ven…”

“It’s nothing.”

“I… love you,” Terra whispers, and Ven wants to yell in happiness.

Instead, he hugs Terra tighter and says, “I love you too.”

Yeah, loving Terra comes with challenges, but you can say the same about any relationship. And Ven doesn’t care; he loves Terra for who he is, and will help him through everything that happens.

He never wants to leave Terra’s side.

**Author's Note:**

> If you want me to write you a short fic, drop in a prompt at my [personal prompt meme](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/AutisticWriters_Personal_Prompt_Meme)!
> 
> [My tumblr](https://anautisticwriter.tumblr.com/).


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